Expectations (1997)

Beautiful and blue eyed, running round in rags

Running for them bloodhounds, burning down your flag

In the wild open field no one’s digging you a hole

Come lay your head at rest now in the bunkers of my soul

Lead me down to the well of your red river

Let me suck it dry and let the Lord be forgiven

My words they all seem worthless, my tunes more weak then strong

For how much of my freedom can you buy with this song

Come let your spirit speak now, a new dawn has begun

Come father blow away now all this hatred from your son

Newborn little girl can I look you in the eyes

For all I know is nothing and all I say disguise

Come let me rock your cradle, you�re better off with lies

For the truth is far too painful and too many people died

I feel this journey’s ending.

All the company has gone

All the seats are empty

I’ve been on this road too long

Can’t you see I’m hiding

While the moon reflects my tears

For too long I’ve been riding

And the feeling disappears

Lead me on, help me off the freeway

It’s a dead end road

Now the car starts bending

As I slowly turn the wheel

I watch the night surrender

But how will I know that you’ll be here

When the night will reappear

And my mind will be unclear

Could you take the trouble

Could you free my eyes from fear

I drove into the nightlife with just one single thing on my mind
The moon seemed full forever and the lights of the city made me blind
So I could only feel the hunger for a woman who would treat me just kind
Dry my tears, wash my scars away tonight

Oh, Cindy please, don’t call me no more
The sound of the phone hurts just like danger knocking on my door
Oh, Cindy please, don’t call me no more
You’re not the reason, you’re not the one I’m living for

So I was drifting even further away from home in my car
And in this late night movie I could barely make it to the bar
So I stared into a beer can, tried to meditate my soul into a star
Ain’t that far, ain’t that far out, my friend

The night it drew a picture that I just had to see
And I stared into a cradle, I saw a monster looking just like me
Oh, the weight of this fiction, how forever ready I’m to sleep
And this real life figure Cindy, how forever she will weep
With the stars, with the wind

Darkness surrounds us and brittle brains we are

Nothing can stop us from falling from a star

And yonder only skies, blank spots in our minds

Spirits are crying an endless aching ‘why’

Oblivion’s appealing for nothing seems worth to try

But yes, I’m doing fine. All this lies behind

And I’m falling free

Sometimes I feel like I’ll leave it all behind

Dust on my lungs and black smoke around my mind

And yonder only skies, blank spots in our minds

Little by little I stumble to your door

Leaving the dust of my failures on your floor

But yes, I’m doing fine. All this lies behind

And I’m falling free

A million years late and a load on my shade

No fuel to create and I crash into fate

With one way to escape

It’s one step through the gates of my last dream

I drink myself to sleep, mama

Listen, the wind comes rolling home

With stories long unknown

For a long time it has blown

Now lays down in a song

Sounds from long before the word

That came to us and cursed

All of us who heard

The beauty of the song

Hear the wind is rolling home

Watch, the sun is on its way

Forever here to stay

And we don’t have to say a word

Just sing a song

The time won’t slip away no more

A breeze to blow our ships ashore

No sign of night, no sign of war

Just the sense of sailing home

Drink the dew fresh from the lawn

We’ve been waiting far too long

Drink the dew before it’s gone

We’ve been waiting far too long

Sometimes you feel that it is time to get that cloud out of your mind

So search the skyline through the windshield for a saviour of any kind

And than three motorcycle boys, passing on the bridge

Outlined black on the deep red sun going down beyond

The green fields of my country

With hungry headlights and a radio station on my way

Waiting on some magic or sensation of a sweet light rain, and than..

You know a story of a boy with his new little toy

On wheels, on the ground, oh Lord give me some gasoline

That I may ride this country a million times around,

Starting right now

So this is true in stories that you read when you are young

And now it happens just before my eyes and in this song

Three motorcycle boys

Save this boat from sinking though the game seems done

Save our souls from shrinking though all hope seems gone

The chaos is strong and the nights are long

And there’s no one in this wilderness that could do us no wrong

If people talk salvation, than wish them they’re right

Cause even if salvation’s just a shimmering light

The dream is justified and it makes it better to fight

Then to sit on our asses and choke in the night

Bring wisdom, bring wisdom for the chosen few

That must lead the many on their way through

You can call this sickness ignorance, you can call it what you want

You can call your life a misery, well  if that’s what you want

You’ll get it for free, but ain’t it easy to see

That life is running backwards if you don’t do what you feel

Those who’re preaching liberty mean nothing to me

Cause preaching brings no guarantee if the preacher’s not free

So just be good to yourself and to anyone else

And forgot what I told here, speak for yourself

It’s hard to say anything if you see what I see

It’s hard to say anything and if it was up to me

We’d ignore what is said and we’d clean our heads

From the books that we read to live it instead

Sleep well, sleep well

May you’re dreams be free from those visions from hell

Brittle eyes in this cruel, cruel world of action

Brittle eyes of unbelief

Brittle eyes in this fatal world of fiction

She wants to walk on water but goes underneath

A river is no river if that river’s gone dry

You’re just challenging your liver

And you know you’re gonna die

A river is no river if that river’s gone dry

Brittle eyes in this steel and concrete jungle

The engine of her life’s now put into another gear

Hidden visions she points out with her fingers

She’s just too young to smell the danger here

See the tissue on the table

See her spitting on the floor

All her senses now gone stone dead

The last twitching on the floor

Is there life in this bloodshed

Is there life in this whore

Fear

You say you are receiving a feeling deep inside
A holy wisdom in a vision, visiting at night
Well as far as I’m concerned this is wisdom of the wine
So I propose we’d call your vision ‘section 29’

In section 29 only spirits are awake
They don’t like alcoholics and they listen to Nick Drake
Well the last thing is forgiven, cause me I do the same
But let me have my liquor when I party in the rain

There’s too many things you tell me that I don’t like
There’s too many words for just one night
There’s s too many things you tell me that I don’t like
Go back to what I’ve called your ‘section 29’

Too much of the good things is too bad for the brain
Believe me I�ve seen many people drive themselves in sane
They come to you and say I am Jesus, I control your mind
Well let me call this mental sickness ‘section 29’

A rat is a noble creature, tight on its four feet
The only thing it cares about is garbage it can eat
So if you might run into one, be carefull when you speak
It won’t hear your moral complications and kills you when you’re weak

Now what was that you talked about, philosophy eased your pain ?
You shiver in your shoes for the world you’re in today
Now look at what a fool you’ve been to call your dream a name
If science won�t bring any fortune than why should you explain

Well I guess this shit will happen again and again
Go leave this place, live your life and take it as a man
You sit and talk as if someone put something in your wine
I guess it’s time we’re leaving ‘section 29’

I’m lying on a sofa at a party of a friend

A lady on each side of me, a  reefer in my hand

The lady on my right says I’m at your command

You can do what you want with me, I said; Please understand

That I’m not at all after you, I’m looking for my Baby Blue

Now crazy Celia, she’s sitting left of me

Says I’ve got a big car, will you drive with me

I said; No, no, no, drive with anyone but me,

You must be thinking you’re on your way to be free

Well, who do you think you are talking to

I’m looking for my Baby Blue

Now speedy Franklin comes and he is promising the sky

But I can’t seem to find the pupils in his eyes

He keeps mumbling I could be next to see his paradise

Well I don’t need your medical advice

I don’t need nothing from this store of you

I’m looking for my Baby Blue

Now college boy Harry says he’s got this strange idea

Baby Blue was in the kitchen, waiting with my beer

She gave it to another guy with whom she disappeared

So I kicked Harry to the floor left him trembling with fear

And stood up from the sofa saying Good night to you

I’m leaving for my Baby Blue

So I walked into the garden and the moon was shining bright

I found my Baby Blue in the shadow of the light

I caught her with a rock star, I invited him to fight

The rock star and my Baby Blue, they both died in the night

And next came a cop, he said; I’m looking for you

Well, I was just looking for my Baby Blue

Twenty five days later I stood up in court

For a judge who must have won an academy award

He says; this case looks clear to me, I can keep it short

Tomorrow you can choose between hanging and the sword

I said; No, no, no, is there no mercy left in you

I’ve done it all for my Baby Blue

Next morning I awoke between the blankets oh so clean

Baby Blue was next to me, oh my candy, oh my cream

No never will I kill you, I awoke her with a scream

and half asleep she asked me; did you have a bad dream

so listen to a wise guy warning you;

Always keep a close watch on your Baby Blue

De laatste trein rolt binnen en het wordt al stiller hier

Daar gaan de laatste stakkers met hun koffers vol papier

Ik schreeuw ‘krijg de tyfus tering’ en ik giet me vol met bier

De dagen kun je krijgen, maar de nacht is niet van jou

Want de nacht zit vol met wijven die verrekken van de kou

En die kijken niet naar mietjes met hun broek in een vouw

Met dat slap geouwehoer van ‘schat ik hou van jou’

Oh, het donker is m’n deken en de stilte is mijn vrouw

In de nacht draait de wereld andersom

In de nacht staar ik eenzaam naar de Dom

In de nacht wacht ik tot de klokken slaan

Want dan weet ik dat het klootjesvolk weer naar z’n werk zal gaan

Ik verrek niet van de honger maar van de eenzaamheid

En ik zit hier stom te zwijgen met een afgelikte meid

Die haar dope niet kan betalen en ze zuigt zich uit het krijt

Met wel honderd geile kerels, maar haar lippen zijn nog rood

Ze krijst ‘geef me nog een lijntje want ik vries hier bijna dood

En m’n kont moet blijven draaien want ik sta twee ruggen rood

Bij die eikel met die bontjas, bij die achterlijke kloot

Die al m’n gaten volspuit, morgen spuit ik hem vol met lood

En ik wil maar niet dood, geen hond hier die me hoort

De wereld op een oor, God ik wil dat je me vermoordt

Want er is niemand in de stad, niemand in dit oord

Niemand die ooit zeggen zal; ‘Ik heb van jou gehoord’

En ik wil maar niet dood